BE Gentle with You

January 12, 2014

What is your self-care approach?

Life is hard to navigate sometimes, especially if you lean into life and your chosen mission fully with your head AND heart.  Fully BEing (living your optimal life), especially when you’re in or emerging from life challenges, is hard for everyone.  Are you transformed or victimized by life’s rough patches?

2013 was a year of intense learning for many of us.  The year presented me with tremendous love and growth, but it also brought me a divorce, a murder of a family member, a unexpected residential move (hard for any family), an intense professional agenda, lots of hip pain and many other less intense learning experiences.  Though each hard lesson was extremely challenging to feel and ponder, I’m thankful for them.

My approach to BEing [living integrated across my Core4 life aspects/priorities and practicing self-care] helps me embolden my already strong heart-brain resiliency.  Many of you that have worked with me 1:1 or in workshops have mapped out your Core4 BEing aspects/priorities.  I hope it’s helping you BE in your whole integrated self as you live and make decisions.  If you haven’t already, map out what yours are.  You don’t have to use the words I do (in orange below), but do stick to the description containers these four areas offer.

My Core4 BEing aspects/priorities are:

  • Soul (spirit & values),
  • Tribe (kin, friends & colleagues),
  • Health (brain & body) &
  • Action (mission & role).

I pause & meditate frequently on each aspect and an integrated whole of them.  It’s my way of allowing my entire being to connect with them…not just my brain.  I also proactively reflect on how I’m showing up in each area and all of them combined.  Finally, I make clear and conscious life decisions from my fearless and integrated whole BEing.

Prioritizing self-care makes BEing even more possible.  I’ve always had a self-care tendency, but my agenda wasn’t intentional and consistent until early last year when a wise friend gave me some game-changing advice during an especially dark time.  “Bry, don’t forget to be gentle with you”, she said.

Here are some of the consistent self-care things I do more consistently since receiving that advice…even when my life seas aren’t stormy.  I:

  • Never lie or hang with people that lie to me for long.
  • Cherish the bedtime ritual I have with my daughter.  I sing her to sleep nightly.  We both benefit.
  • Skype, call or Facetime members of my Tribe.
  • I meditate at home and in cedar saunas as much as I can.  During workdays I insert short meditations between meetings.
  • See my trustworthy life coach and psychologist regularly.  Belief Energy exists in part because of them.
  • Flow yoga and run in nature often.  I often practice these beloved hobbies with loving friends.
  • Make my work a calling vs. a job.  Mission & Commission= Fully BEing at work is possible.
  • I host conscious evenings at my home monthly for 20-40 triBEful friends. We integrate calm meditation & high-energy social connection.  They are magical.  BEing is easier when you have a tribe that you trust.  I hold space for them and lately I’m not afraid to let them hold it for me.  :)
  • Seek and offer humor and laughter as often as I can.
  • Get in nature  often (generally photographing it and sharing it with many of you here).
  • Make my diet & sleeping agendas as productive as possible.
  • Share my heart-brain’s musings with the world.  Self-care doesn’t mean being overly selfish.
  • Never alter my mind with substances to escape or falsely medicate.
  • Live simply & within my means financially.   Appreciating all of it.
  • Watch my favorite sports teams play when I can.
  • Do things that tap my inner most creativity.  Writing poetry, for example.
  • Tune into a Pandora music station called “Calm Meditation”.
  • Dance.
  • Spend time not doing anything…maybe the hardest thing of all for me. :)

Fully BEing and prioritizing self-care helps me take all life’s lessons in stride.  It powers the heart-brain resiliency hat has made me feeling transformed vs. victimized by 2013.  The life I consciously choose is unfolding:

  • I AM GRATEFUL and FUELED BY COMPASSION…
  • I’ve never BEen more awakened & in my soul values or authenticity.
  • I’m surrounded by real love…never closer to my chosen tribe (kin, friends & colleagues).
  • My body and brain have never been this strong and open.  My hip pain is disappearing.
  • I’m allowing and scaling my chosen missions (LinkedIn Nonprofit Solutions & Belief Energy)…even if mainly on my own.
  • I’m sharing all of the above.

I hope this post helps you more fully BE…at home and work.

Assignment:  Journal about the way you practice self-care.  Reflect on or meditate on your approach.  Is it serving you?  Is it related to your Core4 BEing aspects/priorities?  Change it if not.  “Don’t forget to be gentle with you”.  It helps you AND your tribe.

 

 

 

 

 

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